Wednesday, August 18, 2021

"The american dream is dead but if i get elected president i will bring it back"

we wont need 

affordable healthcare 

to protect 

pre existing 

conditions


climate change  

a fabrication 

build a pipeline 


increase gas emissions


comprehensive literacy programs

probably a waste


americans wont 

need to know how to read 

to be the superior race


national heritage areas 

of little importance 

to me


twenty million 

dollars more 

to throw at our military


environmental threats  

so fake 

defund the climate 


change initiative

abolish planned parenthood 

womens healthcare 

just cost prohibitive


i speak out against women 

children and mexicans 

latinos many muslims


ill determine their fate  

millions of lives 

running them all through 

customs


i pledge to play 

with monstrous leaders 

congratulate dictators


spread so many lies

to hypnotize a 

cult of haters


wall street workers 

worship me  

phone number income earners


a group of people so powerful  

theyll turn voters 

into observers                                   


whether or not 

you selected me

i was confident in my 


win


im a prominent 

member 


of the elite 

we only promote  


(from within)


Wednesday, August 11, 2021

"These were three fabulous young men in the prime of their lives"

history shows 

my ceos at the time

were at twenty eight hundred feet


when the engine and rotor 

failed for 

a price i couldnt 


beat

 
less than a minute later 

without a single distress call

garden street parkways 


first helicopter fall 


taj mahal was hemorrhaging 

delays were in construction 


desperate 

determined 

my big 


staged introduction 


people truly failed 

to fathom the depths of my 

con factors


adding insult to injury i 

chose not to pay my 

contractors


double digit interest 

six digit loan

knew in terms of profits

 

i had to be alone


atlantic city gamblers 

my prey 

me the alpha hunter


their losses 

misfortunes

replenishing my

plunder


when payment to 

big banks came due 

fred bought millions of


(casino chips)


a daddy bailout 

setting in motion 

a global 


tr*mpocolypse

Wednesday, August 4, 2021

"I probably identify more as democrat"

if i come out 

as democrat

there might be 

hesitation

but as a registered 

republican 

ill win the nomination


all essence of my triumph 

in history 

of my name

piggy backing 

on freds fortune 

born into his 

fame


adopted as celebrity 

monstrously wealthy rich

star status 

my chief apparatus 

employing 

bait and 

switch


ill grab america 

by her possy 

swindle her to sleep

empowering the powerful

benefits mine to

reap


simpletons 

conservatives 

impressionable 

right wing folks

too easily 

won over by my 

piltdown hoax


deliver you to evil 

lead you to 

temptation

distractions 

retractions 

story of my 

dictation

Monday, August 2, 2021

Table of torments

  • Each quote is the title of a satirical poem that tells a story 
  • Every wednesday this blog will tell one of those stories
  • All quotes are by the former guy said prior to or while holding our highest public office
  • These quotes are all public record
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 


"i probably identify more as democrat" 

"these were three fabulous young men in the prime of their lives" 

"the american dream is dead but if i get elected president i will bring it back" 

"i fight like hell to pay as little as possible" 

"i dont need anybodys money im very rich" 

"its very possible that ill be the first presidential candidate to run for president and make money on it" 

"no collusion" 

"january 20th 2017 will be the day that the people became the rulers of this nation again"

"just to sum up i would do various things very quickly" 

"and we have to start out by building a wall a big powerful beautiful wall"

"weve just launched 59 missiles heading to iraq" 

"and china i like china i just sold an apartment for 15 million dollars to somebody from china" 

"lives are being shattered and destroyed by a mere allegation"

"what a great honor it must be for you to honor me tonight" 

"covfefe" 

"we cant fix a rigged system by relying on the people who rigged it in the first place"

"the united states will withdraw from the paris climate accord thank you"

"shes in such great physical shape"

"were gonna handle north korea we handle everything"

"tonight we put aside all the policy fights in washington dc youve been hearing about with the fake news and all of that"

"tremendous medical costs"

"fine people on both sides"

"the first statement i made was a fine statement making the statement when i made it was excellent"

"our movement is a movement built on love"

"we want to take care of the people of texas"

"have a good time everybody"

"what the hell is going on with global waming please come back fast we need you"

"son of a bitch"

"the calm before the storm"

"to the families of the victims we are praying for you"

“thoughts and prayers”

"our healthcare plan is really going to be something excellent"

"our healthcare plan is really going to be something excellent"

"the beating heart of our plan is a tax cut for working families" 

"he totally denies it he says it never happened"

"i have determined it is time to officially recognize jerusalem as the capital of israel"

"will be leaving florida for washington today at 4pm"

"im a stable genius" 

"my positions are going to be what the people in this room come up with"

"theyre shithole countries"

"i would not have made certain deals if it werent for golf"

"virtually everything said has been said incorrectly and its been said wrong or its been covered wrong by the press"

"successful people have a lot going on on their desk"

"fake news folks fake news typical new york times fake story"

"the united states is a compassionate nation"

"we fulfilled far more promises than we promised"

"were bringing back those 4 magnificent words made in the usa"

"i really believe id run in there even if i didnt have a weapon"

"i want a parade like the one in france"

"you have people who care about you who love you and who will do anything at all to protect you"

"learn before you speak"

“youre a rude terrible person”

"these arent people these are animals and were taking them out of the country at a level and at a rate thats never happened before"                                                   

"please inform him that i too have a nuclear button but it is a much bigger and more powerful one"

fifth

i pled the fifth once i was just a witness i pled the fifth twice it was my first deposition i pled the fifth thrice  it was an unscrupulous...